Patricia Carty: Len and I first met when we were 16 at a high school dance.
Len Sanci: I actually went to St. Michael’s College, an all-boys school in Toronto, but all my friends in the neighbourhood went to Riverdale in the city’s east end. They brought me to their dances sometimes so I could meet girls.
PC: There were a bunch of us in a group, so it wasn’t a one-on-one thing. My group of girlfriends hung out with Lenny and his friends for a few years. I always liked him, but we were never romantic.
LS: I liked her, sure. But I was dating her friend for a while.
PC: When I met my future husband, Michael, I introduced him to Lenny and his sweetheart, Marilyn. They came to our wedding in 1958 and we went to theirs a year or so later.
LS: September 1960. When I went into business in 1970 as a Ford dealer in Oakville, Ont. Michael became my accountant and stayed for the next 30 years.
PC: I was a stay-at-home mother in Kitchener-Waterloo, Ont., and a yoga teacher on the side. As couples, we visited back and forth. We both had children about the same age so we’d visit them whenever we could. And of course we sent them Christmas cards.
LS: I was newly married and doing all the things you’re supposed to do, like send Christmas cards. After Christmas every year we’d throw out a big pile of cards. I think it was 1969 when I decided to pick 10 cards from good friends and mail them all back. I wrote, “Merry Christmas … again this year.”
PC: We thought it was so funny! I put his card away all year and mailed the same card back. Again.
LS: We did this every year for 45 years. Well, almost every year. One year we were doing renovations and thought we’d lost it. I found it about March and started up again.
PC: We eventually had it framed (on a wooden background) so we had more room to write messages, and we did that right up until 2014. Michael passed away in June and Marilyn passed away in September. They had both been sick for a long time and we were both devastated. We would call often to see how each other was doing.
LS: By the time Christmas came around, I was wondering what I should do about the card. I could have just put it in the mail but I decided to deliver it by hand.
PC: We went to lunch and had a wonderful time. Then we talked on the phone, we got closer, he’d come and visit me and I’d go there. At 81, we realized we were much better together than we were apart. We started to think we might as well move in together but, being old-fashioned, we thought we should get married first.
LS: The priest still had us take the pre-marriage lessons. After 54 years of marriage, I knew I could pass.
PC: I think we were the oldest couple our priest ever married. We had a lovely wedding on Thanksgiving 2019 at St. Andrew’s Church in Oakville. My daughter was my maid-of-honour and Lenny’s grandson was the best man. The granddaughters were bridesmaids. All our friends were there — about a hundred people.
LS: We’re so fortunate that our first marriages were good too and we were all friends. I’ve had some low spots along the way, but I’m happy again now. My life has been so great.
PC: Lenny’s first wife was a lovely lady and a good friend. My husband always admired Len so I think Michael would be quite happy for us. I don’t think he’d want me to be alone and growing old can be lonely if you don’t have anyone. I’d known Len forever, we have all the same values, so it was a very easy decision for me to marry him.
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